Kingston Somadi: Brother to Brother

Brutally honest self assessment is a bitter pill to swallow for most men; and black men are certainly no exception. This includes also the dicey area of brothers' reactions to being held accountable for their unsavory actions by other brothers.

I'm very serious about this!
I've lost two black brothers as friends this week already(and today's only Tuesday!) because of saying to them the truth about their unacceptable behaviors that needed to change.

No one is expecting black men to be paragons of virtue.
All that is needed is that we as black men HONESTLY TRY TO BE BETTER TODAY THAN WE WERE YESTERDAY, AND BETTER TOMORROW THAN WE ARE TODAY.
Ase.

~ Kingston Somadi ~

https://cassiuslife.com/41871/am-i-one-of-the-good-ones/

https://cassiuslife.com/41871/am-i-one-of-the-good-ones/

BROTHER TO BROTHER: FIX OURSELVES, FIX OUR SONS

This morning on Good Morning America featured discussion on the growing issue of sexting among teens becoming a "plague". Teen boys are asking teen girls to send them nude photographs, and girls who say No are pressured then threatened both verbally and physically.

What has the general response been?

To counsel the girls who've said Yes NOT to send nude photos of themselves, thereby enmasse forcing the trend to 'die out'.

While I do always encourage being proactive in dealing with problematic issues that arise in one's life, the above advice is NOT instilling proactivity; it is asking the victim of oppression to solve their own oppression and does nothing at all to hold the ones oppressing accountable for their repugnant and detrimental behaviour!
Instead of telling the girls not to send nude photos, how about telling the boys NOT TO DEMAND OR ASK AT ALL FOR NUDE PHOTOS!
The permissive attitude of not addressing the behavior of the boys is what had made even more fertile the current breeding ground for sexual assault, which includes sexual coercion, rape, harassment, fault stigma, verbal threats etc., against women.
This isn't rocket science, brothers!
We need to come get our sons; we're still slipping! As Malcolm X once said, "We DONE slipped"!
We fix our sons by first fixing ourselves. What our boys are doing is learned behavior. Learned misogyny. Learned embracing and oppressively executing male entitlement, and learning that doing so has been pretty much normalized.

Also making females to carry the burden of fixing the dysfunctions of males in this society has become the norm. Why would we allow our sons to learn this behavior as being acceptable? We don't teach them that the norm is having someone wipe their asses for them after using the toilet do we?

We have to correct this bullshyt. Fix it! Fix ourselves, and by doing so fix our sons and therefore correct the devaluing of our daughters.

TO MY SISTERS: SEE WHILE YOU'RE LOOKING!

True story... A brother once asked me to loan him some money. For what I asked. He wanted it to but his queen an exquisite engagement ring. Beautiful desire; but Altho he's my brother and I love him I told him no. In fact those were the very reasons I said no!

I feel that if a man is not financially prepared to appropriately symbolize entering an intimate, adult, life-relationship with a mate, then he probably isn't financially prepared to enter the undertaking itself that is being symbolized.  When the ring is being given, it is more than just the giving of a ring.
If I'd loaned him the money for the ring, he would have been presenting to her a representation of MY financial situation, not HIS.

So he ought to wait to give it until he is able and set to come correctly regarding the whole 9 yards.

Honestly, a half stepping mindset is usually pervasive, rather than representative of isolated actions! In other words believe who he is the FIRST time he shows you!
I believe Sisters need to understand that about their mates same way they do about themselves and quit feeling guilted or obligated by antiquated ideals to accept financial unpreparedness just because "he loves you"!

#WarriorAffirmation

"ASSUME THE POSITION!"

Today is Sunday; even though many of us do not regard it as the "Sabbath", it's still known to be a day of rest, relaxation, and revitalization.
So right now you may be saying, "To HELL with The Position, I'm in chill mode today and Kingston better go on somewhere with that today!"  

Ok. I hear you! 😊 Go on and chill. Rest your body. Relax your mind.

But never forget that We are living in a system of white supremacy designed to exclude our welfare and therefore perpetually to endorse Our irrelevance and uphold our oppression; so We cannot afford to ever COMPLETELY relax  Our minds sleeping in the camp of our enemy!
Even if you relax your body, Assume The Position MENTALLY. Always!
In other words, STAY WOKE DAMMIT.

Yesterday's Kwanzaa Principle for
the fifth day of Kwanzaa was "Nia" or Purpose.
What is your purpose Kindreds?

If you still aren't quite sure, spend 2018 pursuing the answer!

Time is only your friend if you employ it!

Much love to All of You.
Your brother Kingston Somadi
<3
👑

It's been awhile, but I'm back!
Happy Summer of 2017!

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/the_history_of_american_slavery/2015/06/animated_interactive_of_the_history_of_the_atlantic_slave_trade.html